Orgy in broad daylight! Perverts!
Think back to when you were six, the school, the friendships, the mischief. Six year olds and mischief go together very well indeed. Sometimes a little to well.
Now imagine you’re six and you shave off all the long hair on someone’s head. How much trouble would you be in?
Later today my six year old son will be shaving off my hair. I’ve had long hair since before he was born so no doubt it’ll take some getting used to. The best way to acclimatise him to my soon to be bald head is to have him shave it. As for my girlfriend, she’s not looking forward to this at all.
So, why let my six year old son shave my head?
Something happened and I felt I had to do something about it. I’m fundraising for Cancer Research in the hope that someone will benefit.
If you can, please donate. If not, please retweet.
I bet this will make you feel all warm and fuzzy inside……..
Can you imagine working for a company that only has a little more than 635 employees, but, has the following employee statistics..
29 have been accused of spouse abuse
7 have been arrested for fraud
9 have been accused of writing bad cheques
17 have directly or indirectly bankrupted at least 2 businesses
3 have done time for assault
71 cannot get a credit card due to bad credit
14 have been arrested on drug-related charges
8 have been arrested for shoplifting
21 are currently defendants in lawsuits
84 have been arrested for drink driving in the last year
and, collectively, this year alone, they have cost the British tax payer
£92,993,748 in expenses!
Which organisation is this? (No, surprisingly not the Tories)
It’s the 635 members of the House of Commons.
The same group that cranks out hundreds of new laws each year designed to keep the rest of us in line.
What a bunch of crooks and Idiots we have running our country - it says it all…
And just to top all that they probably have the best ‘corporate’ pension
scheme in the country!!
If you agree that this is an appalling state of affairs, please share
it with everyone you know.
Cinderella is now 75 years old. After a fulfilling life with the now dead Prince, she happily sits upon her rocking chair, watching the world go by from her front porch, with a cat named Bob for companionship.
One sunny afternoon, out of nowhere, appeared the Fairy Godmother.
Cinderella said “Fairy Godmother, what are you doing here after all these years?”
The Fairy godmother replied, “Cinderella, you have lived an exemplary life since I last saw you. Is there anything for which your heart still yearns?”
Cinderella was taken aback, overjoyed, and after some thoughtful consideration, and almost under her breath she uttered her first wish:
“I wish I were wealthy beyond comprehension.” Instantly, her rocking chair was turned into solid gold. Cinderella was stunned. Bob, her old faithful cat, jumped off her lap and scampered to the edge of the porch, quivering with fear.
Cinderella said, “Oh thank you, Fairy Godmother.”
The Fairy Godmother replied “It is the least I can do. What does your heart want for your second wish?”
Cinderella looked down at her frail body, and said: “I wish I were young and full of the beauty of youth again”.
At once, her wish became reality, and her beautiful youthful visage returned. Cinderella felt stirrings inside her that had been dormant for years. A long-forgotten vigour and vitality began to course through her.
Then the Fairy Godmother again spoke, “You have one more wish, what shall you have?”
Cinderella looks over to the frightened cat in the corner and says, “I wish for you to transform Bob, my old cat, into a kind and handsome young man.”
Magically, Bob suddenly underwent so fundamental a change in his biological make-up that, when complete he stood before her, a man so beautiful the likes of which neither she nor the world had ever seen.
The Fairy Godmother again spoke, “Congratulations, Cinderella. Enjoy your new life.” And, with a blazing shock of bright blue electricity, she was gone.
For a few eerie moments, Bob and Cinderella looked into each other’s eyes. Cinderella sat, breathless, gazing at the most stunningly perfect man she had ever seen. Then Bob walked over to Cinderella, who sat transfixed in her rocking chair, and held her close in his young muscular arms. He leaned in close, blowing her golden hair with his warm breath as he whispered:
“Bet you’re sorry you neutered me now.”
The Black Knight Rises!
Threadless tee design
I can’t be the only one who wants to see Angus Deaton return to @bbchignfy ?
I’d love to see bikers and cyclists filter on the white line of an unused #Olympic Lane in #London. Miles & miles of CCTV watching closely.
While we obsess over the sex, the whips, the spankings, the plugs and the gags, D/s is a cerebral pursuit. We’re attracted to one another because of the ways that our minds work when it comes to sex, and so it’s exactly because the things that we want are driven by the mental side that we can revel quite so much in the physical.
It’s why I can tell you to dress up like a whore, and we can both entirely enjoy that. It’s objectifying but, because you’re safe in that mental space we’ve created between us, that’s ok. You can enjoy it, and flourish in it. You can savour the feel of the fishnets and the mesh against your skin, the latex and the ridiculously short skirts. You can let me write obscene things on your skin, and you can trace your fingers over it after.
We’re intellectual powerhouses behind closed doors. Chess Masters with whips and leather. We got this. We’re the sex nerds, the geeks who love it just a little bit too much, except it’s never too much. We obsess over the little things, and drown in a sea of bliss when it comes to the bigger ones. Things that are negative in other relationships, in other contexts, we’ve seized for our own, and turned into something beautiful and liberating.
I can call you a slut because we both know what I mean, and we can enjoy the perversion of that word that was already a perversion. We’re a twisting, turning, delicate dance of meaning and definition, all wrapped up in a delicious layer of masochism and depravity. I spank you because you like it, but also because I don’t spank you for the same reason a parent spanks a child. We’re adult enough to tap into that feeling, harness it, and turn it into something of our own.
We’re the geeks of getting laid, and we all know the geeks have the most fun.